From Superheroes to Porn Stars to Politicians, Who Appears in Our Sexual Fantasies?
February 3, 2020 by Justin Lehmiller
Almost everyone has sexual fantasies, and most of us have them often. We fantasize about a wide range of activities, from group sex to BDSM to doing something that is socially taboo. But who is it that we fantasize about doing all of these things with? Our real-life lovers? Celebrities? Fictional characters?
I surveyed 4,175 Americans aged 18-87 about their sex fantasies for my book Tell Me What You Want and, among the many things I inquired about were the people who appear in our fantasies. Specifically, I asked participants how often they fantasize about dozens of different persons, including their current romantic partner (if they have one), ex-partners, best friends, celebrities, porn stars, politicians, superheroes and comic book characters, as well as faceless, anonymous individuals.
Check out the infographic below to see how many people said they have ever had a sexual fantasy about each of these individuals. Note that the data are separated by both gender and sexual orientation. One of the things you’ll undoubtedly notice is that there are some intriguing differences.
For example, men (regardless of sexual orientation) are more likely to have fantasized about celebrities, porn stars, and their exes than are women. Likewise, gay and bisexual men are the most likely to have fantasized about a friend, whereas heterosexual women are least likely to have done so. Also, sexual minorities (regardless of gender) are the most likely to have had comic-book inspired fantasies.
Of course, there are also some important similarities across groups. For instance, almost everyone of every gender and sexuality group represented here has fantasized about a current partner, while relatively few folks have ever fantasized about a politician. Likewise, most people say they’ve fantasized about an ex, a celebrity, and a vague, faceless person at one point or another.
What do you think? Do these results line up with the people who appear in your fantasies? Weigh in with your comments below and check out my book Tell Me What You Want to learn more about the science of sexual fantasies.
Infographic designed by Luis Muela. Thanks for this awesome and creative image!
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Image Source: 123RF/tobkatrina
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Dr. Justin Lehmiller
Founder & Owner of Sex and PsychologyDr. Justin Lehmiller is a social psychologist and Research Fellow at The Kinsey Institute. He runs the Sex and Psychology blog and podcast and is author of the popular book Tell Me What You Want. Dr. Lehmiller is an award-winning educator, and a prolific researcher who has published more than 50 academic works.
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