Episode 492: Why So Many People Fantasize About Sharing Their Partner
April 14, 2026 by Justin Lehmiller
Being turned on by the idea of sharing your partner with someone else is a surprisingly common sexual fantasy, and it’s something many couples are actively exploring in real life. In today’s show, we’re diving into a practice known as hotwifing, including how common it is and the psychology behind it.
My guest is Kathy Kay, host of the Strictly Anonymous Podcast and author of the new book Strictly Anonymous Confessions: Secret Sex Lives of Total Strangers, a collection of real, unfiltered stories from people revealing their most private sexual thoughts and experiences.
Some of the specific topics we explore include:
- What is hotwifing, and how is it similar to or different from cuckolding?
- What are some common themes involved in hotwifing fantasies?
- Why is hotwifing appealing to so many people?
- What are people’s experiences with hotwifing like?
To learn more, check out the Strictly Anonymous website.
Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology.
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Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.
Dr. Justin Lehmiller
Founder & Owner of Sex and PsychologyDr. Justin Lehmiller is a social psychologist and Research Fellow at The Kinsey Institute. He runs the Sex and Psychology blog and podcast and is author of the popular book Tell Me What You Want. Dr. Lehmiller is an award-winning educator, and a prolific researcher who has published more than 50 academic works.
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