Books & Films, Potpourri

Holiday Shopping Ideas For The Sexy People In Your Life

December 7, 2022 by Justin Lehmiller

If you haven’t started your holiday shopping yet, now’s the time! With supply chain issues and shipping delays piling up, it’s a good idea to get started a little earlier than usual so that you aren’t empty handed when the time comes. Don’t know what to get? Allow me to make your job a little easier. If you’re in need of shopping inspiration for the sexy people in your life, here are some sex-themed gift ideas (mostly) inspired by science for everyone on your list.

Give the Gift of Sexual Communication (and Orgasms!)

Many people find it challenging to communicate about their sexual fantasies and desires. This stems from the fact that most of us received poor sex education that taught us only one sexual communication skill: just say no. Unfortunately, that isn’t particularly helpful when it comes to telling your partner what you want. And that’s a big part of the reason why I wrote Tell Me What You Want: The Science of Sexual Desire and How It Can Help You Improve Your Sex Life.

This book explores the most common sex fantasies and where they come from in an attempt to help reduce a lot of the shame people have about them. However, Tell Me What You Want also offers practical advice and information when it comes to sharing and acting on your fantasies so that you can feel more confident making the leap from fantasy to reality in cases where it is mutually desired.

This book has the potential to enhance your sex life in numerous ways. Research has found that couples who talk about and act out their sex fantasies are more sexually satisfied. Likewise, research reveals that women who share and act on their fantasies have more orgasms, which means that getting in touch with our fantasies has the potential to help close the orgasm gap! How awesome is that?

Give the Gift of Touch

Consider a “hands-on” present this year by learning some massage techniques that you can use on your partner. Touch is a vital part of happy and healthy relationships because it promotes intimacy and can help relieve stress (read more about the power of touch here)—plus, massage is an easy way to add more touch to any relationship. My go-to recommendation for massage technique is MELT: Massage for Couples, an online video series taught by Australian massage therapist Denis Merkas. MELT is the perfect holiday gift because it’s the kind of present that keeps on giving all year round.

Give Them Something Sexy to Listen to (or Watch) with a Gift Subscription

Sex & Psychology Premium is available on Apple Podcasts! This is the subscriber-only version of my Sex and Psychology Podcast. It will allow you to listen to new episodes of the show ad-free for an uninterrupted experience. Plus, you’ll receive exclusive access to bonus interviews from some of my fantastic guests featuring their favorite sex and relationship tips! Treat yourself to a subscription for just $3.99/month, or gift a subscription with an Apple gift card. Learn more here.

Give the gift of pleasure with Beducated! They have a whole library of online courses to teach you what you need to know. Treat yourself or a loved one to a subscription this holiday season and get 40% off their yearly pass by using my last name – LEHMILLER – as the coupon code. Sign up here.

Give the Gift of Sexy Swag

Check out the Sex and Psychology store, where you can get your hands on some fun and sexy swag, including tank tops, tee-shirts, mugs, stickers, sweatshirts, and more. There are several fun product lines to choose from, including:

  • Let’s Talk About Sex! (for anyone with sex on the brain)
  • Sex Geek (for any student of sex)
  • Sapiosexual (for anyone who’s turned on by intelligence—a little, or a LOT)
  • Sex and Psychology (for all of the fans)
  • Tell Me What You Want (for the fantasy fanatics)

I’m pleased to say that a portion of the proceeds for items purchased through the Sex and Psychology store goes to Planned Parenthood, the largest provider of sex education and sexual health services in the United States. Get some cool stuff AND make a difference at the same time! Use discount code WINTER20 to get 20% off your total purchase through my store!

Give Away Some Sexy Books

Everyone needs some good, all-around sex books on their shelves, right? One classic you can’t go wrong with is Mary Roach’s Bonk: The Curious Coupling of Science and Sex. This book actually started me down my journey of becoming a sex researcher!

A few of my personal favorite books (all of which I’ve recently covered on the podcast) include:

Other great books about the science of sex and relationships that are always on my list include: Perv: The Sexual Deviant in All of UsThe Chemistry Between Us: Love, Sex, and the Science of Attraction, Why Is Sex Fun? The Evolution of Human Sexuality, and The All-or-Nothing Marriage: How the Best Marriages Work.

For a complete list of reading suggestions broken down by category (from opening up a relationship to kink to sex tips), check out my bookcase.

Give the Gift of Toys and Fun!

Get hard for the holidays with FirmTech! Their Performance Ring is designed to boost your sexual stamina, give you longer-lasting erections, and enhance pleasure, while their Tech Ring has the added benefit of tracking your erectile health. Visit and use my exclusive discount code Justin20 to save 20% off your purchase. Talk about a fun way to “ring” in the New Year!

If you’re in the market for something that satisfies all season long, consider a LoveHoney Advent Calendar! They offer different toy-centric options for couples, singles, as well a lingerie set that will get you in the mood faster than you can say “mistletoe!”

Just looking for a fun or humorous holiday sex gift? You just can’t go wrong with Pornogami: A Guide to the Ancient Art of Paper Folding for Adults. I mean, who doesn’t want to learn erotic origami? I own a copy of this one and it’s definitely a fun book!

Or how about The Sock Monkey Kama Sutra? In this book, sock monkeys demonstrate a range of sexual positions in a fun and playful way—it’s a great beginner’s guide to exploring some new things in the bedroom.

Looking for a fun cookbook? I suggest 50 Shades of Chicken: A Parody in a Cookbook, which contains the most seductive chicken recipes you’ll find anywhere (side note: my mom got a real kick out of this when I bought it for her a couple of years ago!).

And if you want to make your White Elephant exchange a teachable moment, give the gift of syphilis or gonorrhea (not literally, of course). You can buy plush toys that mimic the appearance of these actual microbes, which come complete with an image of the microscopic organism the toy was modeled after. Or, buy the entire set of microbes, which even comes with a plush dose of penicillin. I have them sitting on a shelf in my office!

Looking for other sexual health and wellness products? I have you covered! Check out my recommended list here.

Happy holiday shopping!

Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook (, Twitter (@JustinLehmiller), or Reddit ( to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram.

Top Photo Credit: 123RF/deagreez

**If you purchase any products using the links above or use discount codes mentioned, a portion of the sales price will go toward supporting this blog. If you’re making other purchases on Amazon, you can also support Sex and Psychology by using this link.

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Written by
Dr. Justin Lehmiller
Founder & Owner of Sex and Psychology

Dr. Justin Lehmiller is a social psychologist and Research Fellow at The Kinsey Institute. He runs the Sex and Psychology blog and podcast and is author of the popular book Tell Me What You Want. Dr. Lehmiller is an award-winning educator, and a prolific researcher who has published more than 50 academic works.

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