Episode 519: How To Revive A Dead Bedroom
July 17, 2026 by Justin Lehmiller
In the previous episode, we explored why dead bedrooms happen and just how common they are. Today, we’re shifting from understanding the problem to finding solutions, with practical, evidence-based strategies for rebuilding intimacy, navigating desire discrepancies, and improving sexual communication. If you’re hoping to reconnect with your partner, this episode is for you.
I am joined once again by Dr. Lauren Fogel Mersy, a licensed psychologist, AASECT-certified sex therapist, and certified emotionally focused couples therapist. She specializes in sexual health and relationships and owns a private practice in Minnesota. She is the co-author of the book, Desire: An Inclusive Guide to Navigating Libido Differences in Relationships.
Some of the specific topics we explore in this episode include:
- How can couples move forward when only one partner is dissatisfied with their sex life?
- Are there topics couples should avoid when discussing desire discrepancies?
- How can understanding responsive desire help couples reconnect sexually?
- Why might taking sex off the table temporarily help revive a dead bedroom?
- How can couples make scheduled intimacy feel exciting instead of obligatory?
You can check our Lauren’s website to learn more about her work. You can also find her on Instagram and Facebook @drlaurenfogelmersy.
Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology.
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If you’re looking to gain a broad understanding of human sexuality or refresh your knowledge, check out the upcoming Human Sexuality Intensive courses at the Kinsey Institute: https://kinseyinstitute.org/learning/human-sexuality-intensive.html
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Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.
Dr. Justin Lehmiller
Founder & Owner of Sex and PsychologyDr. Justin Lehmiller is a social psychologist and Research Fellow at The Kinsey Institute. He runs the Sex and Psychology blog and podcast and is author of the popular book Tell Me What You Want. Dr. Lehmiller is an award-winning educator, and a prolific researcher who has published more than 50 academic works.
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