Relationships: The Importance of Being Growth-Oriented

July 5, 2019 by Justin Lehmiller

A lot of people end relationships before ever truly giving them a chance, and it’s because many of us take the “shopping list” approach to love. In other words, some people have an extensive checklist of the things they’re looking for and they don’t stick with partners who fail to meet their criteria.

However, as I discuss in the video below—filmed as part of the Alpha Omega Project—this is a problematic way to approach relationships and it may prevent us from finding love. Instead, we may be better off taking a growth-oriented approach and keeping an eye toward what a relationship could potentially become rather than expecting that a relationship should be your ideal from the very beginning.

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Image Credit: Photo by Oziel Gómez on Unsplash

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Written by
Dr. Justin Lehmiller
Founder & Owner of Sex and Psychology

Dr. Justin Lehmiller is a social psychologist and Research Fellow at The Kinsey Institute. He runs the Sex and Psychology blog and podcast and is author of the popular book Tell Me What You Want. Dr. Lehmiller is an award-winning educator, and a prolific researcher who has published more than 50 academic works.

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