Sex Question Friday: Why Are So Many Straight Guys Turned On By “Squirting?”
July 3, 2014 by Justin Lehmiller
Every Friday on the blog, I answer people’s questions about sex, love, and relationships. This week’s question comes from a reader who wanted to know the following:
“I can’t help but notice that there’s a lot more squirting in porn lately. Why do straight guys suddenly seem so interested in watching women squirt?”
Thanks for this great question! “Squirting” (the colloquial term for female ejaculation) certainly seems to have “exploded” on the internet in the last few years. Consider this: out of the 60 different video categories currently available on Pornhub (one of the world’s largest online porn sites), “squirt” is the 11th most popular category and contains over 1,300 different clips. “Squirt” is also reportedly the third most popular search term on the entire site [1].
The growing popularity of squirting is interesting in light of the fact that this isn’t some newly discovered female phenomenon. In fact, female ejaculation is a topic that even the ancient Greeks wrote about [2]! However, it seems that a lot of people are just now learning about it and, for them, the novelty of squirting may at least partially explain the sudden surge in interest we’ve seen.
Of course, there is more to the story than novelty. Unfortunately, though, I haven’t really seen any research dedicated to understanding the popularity of squirting in porn or, more generally, why so many heterosexual men find it to be arousing. So, the best I can do is offer my hypotheses.
I suspect that the biggest factor underlying the appeal of squirting is that men take it as “proof” that a woman had an orgasm. Whereas there is usually visible evidence of a man’s orgasm in the form of semen (I say “usually” because men sometimes orgasm without ejaculating and vice versa), there is no such obvious sign that a woman has reached orgasm. Sure, many women scream and moan or writhe convulsively, but guys are well aware that women sometimes fake it (in fact, studies find that a majority of women admit to having faked one or more orgasms). So when a woman has an ejaculatory orgasm, it may resolve that uncertainty about whether she climaxed because ejaculation is harder to pretend.
Why is this “proof” of orgasm important to so many guys? For some of them, it probably stems from a simple desire to know that the woman enjoyed herself and was sexually satisfied. I know there’s this common stereotype that men only care about their own pleasure, but most guys do care and they want to know that the sex was mutually enjoyable.
For other guys, however, there is probably an element of ego to it. “Proof” that a woman had an orgasm in the form of squirting may be taken by some guys as validation of their masculinity (e.g., “I’m the man”) or sexual competence.
Of course, other explanations are certainly possible—and, as I said, there really isn’t much research to speak of on heterosexual men’s feelings about squirting. So what are your thoughts or hypotheses? Feel free to weigh in below in the Comments section.
To learn more about squirting, check out this article. And please keep in mind that ejaculation is not something that all women seem to experience, so it’s not something that should be expected. Likewise, if a woman doesn’t ejaculate, it is not necessarily a sign that she’s faking her orgasms or wasn’t sexually satisfied.
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[1] Ogas, O., & Gaddam, S. (2011). A Billion Wicked Thoughts: What the Internet Tells Us About Sexual Relationships. Penguin.
[2] Korda, J. B., Goldstein, S. W., & Sommer, F. (2010). Sexual medicine history: The history of female ejaculation. The Journal of Sexual Medicine, 7, 1965-1975.
Image Source: iStockphoto.com
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Dr. Justin Lehmiller
Founder & Owner of Sex and PsychologyDr. Justin Lehmiller is a social psychologist and Research Fellow at The Kinsey Institute. He runs the Sex and Psychology blog and podcast and is author of the popular book Tell Me What You Want. Dr. Lehmiller is an award-winning educator, and a prolific researcher who has published more than 50 academic works.
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